DM | Thomas Koch | https://twitter.com/ThomasAKoch
UZO | Warren Reid | https://twitter.com/urbanmasque
REMY the Fox | Beau C. Williams | https://twitter.com/Beau_C_Williams
ANDRASTE | Tiana Hanson | https://twitter.com/Vana1895
RUKUS | Aaron Acosta | https://twitter.com/AaronThatDay
Music and sound by http://www.syrinscape.com
OpenForge Terrain 3D printed by the Quests and Chaos.
Chaos Agents Ep 05 – Task Management
Our heroes start the episode at Phaulkonmere Manor, about to meet the Emerald Enclave. After figuring out they should knock, Melannor Fellbranch welcomes them in and introduces them to Lady Jareth Phaulkon, a disembodied voice that is powerful but cannot leave the manor. They say word has already spread of the Foxy Irregulars’ deeds and the Enclave excited to have Andraste join them. Uzo says it was mostly his doing.
Andraste is concerned because if the Emerald Enclave is interested in balance, then that allows evil as well as good. Melannor explains this is true, but evil has too much power, so the Enclave does Good and will help Andraste do Good.
Jareth says that there are walking scarecrows in the outlying farms and wants the Foxy Irregulars to stop them. Enclave will pay in information, free care for their animals, and gives Andraste a silver necklace which holds six charges of greater restoration, which is powerful enough to restore Uzo’s sight. (edit: This was clarified later, as 6 charges, 4 required for greater restoration, two for lesser restoration.
Uzo is skeptical though. He asks if the Andraste must go when the Enclave calls. He says that is this much altruism was in Waterdeep, then the city wouldn’t be like this. After all the Irregulars’ altruism “comes at a price.”
Jareth says that Andraste can turn down any summons. She also tells Uzo that the talking horse Maxine can be found on the main road, and gives information that the tower next door is part of the evil imbalance, but beyond the Irregulars’ capabilities.
Remy invites the disembodied voice that can’t leave the manor to come visit the Irregular Tavern, but Andraste urges them to go seek out the scarecrow and decide whether to join the Enclave later. Baga goes into a huge garden to be pampered and Remy asks if Uzo will be all right without him. Uzo replies he’ll be fine but Remy can’t sleep on the bed with him until Baga returns.
On the way out of town, Uzo tries to find the talking horse, and Remy points out many animals and inanimate objects to torment him.
The Irregulars start the search at the Jones farm where one animal pen looks roughed up. Alexander Jones says a few days ago he saw a scarecrow from another farm, but then it disappeared. That night, his steer (Rukus gets it confused with a steed) was eaten and its bones left behind. Jones recommends heading toward the Hawthorne farm since the last time he saw the scarecrow was near the creek between them.
Remy asks if Jones can pay them, but Jones is poor. Rukus suggests payment could be the joy of seeing a man being torn apart by a scarecrow. Andraste says it’s fine if Jones tells the brewers’ guild about their work when he sells them grain.
The team heads towards the Hawthorne farm and sees a shape go by toward the creek. Uzo wants to plan, but Remy is already running after it. The others follow in time to see it’s two animate scarecrows.
Finally getting to fight something during their break from Tavern Simulator, the Irregulars have to fight off the terror the scarecrows inspire. Uzo casts Armor of Agathys on himself and Rukus goes off in an inexplicable direction to try and be fancy but is actually ineffective. He immediately throws an axe and misses. Andraste’s sacred flame however is quite useful against the flammable enemies.
Uzo kills one scarecrow and tries to hop the small stream to attack the next but falls in the river instead. Lamenting that this is why he needs Baga, Rukus replies “I don’t think Baga would have helped.” Remy uses him as a springboard to attack the second scarecrow, almost setting off Uzo’s armor attack spell, and sees there’s actually a third enemy. Meanwhile Andraste tries to catch up and Rukus is still ineffective.
The fight is easily wrapped up, but not before blind Uzo shoots his crossbow, almost hitting Remy. Andraste uses burning hands, almost hitting Remy, and singeing the feathers on his hat. Not to be outdone, Rukus misses his attack and almost hits Remy, and Andraste almost burns Rukus again.
The scarecrows are just inert straw and burlap now that they’re dead, and Rukus takes a stuffed sack he calls a “heart” as a trophy. They investigate the area, and Rukus teases Uzo about being blind and looking around. Uzo his bandages, exposing sunken sockets where his eyes can be. He says he can see as well as any of them and wears the bandages for their benefit.
The Irregulars only see three sets of footprints so decide all the scarecrows are dead. While they discuss what to do with the bodies, Jones appears, having seen the fight. Remy says to make sure to give a good word to the brewers and invites Jones to the tavern.
From there they head toward the Hawthorne farm where there are many pigs and a smell to match. The farmer isn’t interested in any of the goings on and isn’t helpful, so the team heads back to Waterdeep. As they head back toward Phaulkonmere, Uzo spots a magic horse with his eldritch sight. Remy bribes the carriage driver so Uzo can talk to Maxine, the talking horse that the Harper had told him to look for. Maxine, in an oddly high-pitched voice remembers giving a ride to a pair that match Davil and Yagra’s description and says she heard them talking about hiring spies to find all the Xanathar hideouts. Remy starts singing sea shanties with the passengers on the carriage while Uzo asks about the elf killings but gets no new information.
The Irregulars return to Lady Jareth quickly, after only three hours. Uzo looks for Baga, Rukus shows off his stuffed heart, and Remy says he will keep the singed feathers as a point of pride.
Jareth says she was right to recruit them and offers to give Uzo’s eyes back. He accepts, and with much pain, they grow back in his sockets. He can see again and didn’t even lose his eldritch sight. Touched by this, Andraste says she will join the Enclave. Uzo experiments with his eyes and asks Andraste to teach him to read.
For lunch, the foursome return to the Yawning Portal where Uzo tries to read a menu upside down. They spend a lot of time ordering food and beer, and Remy shows off a pouch full of herb he got from the Emerald Enclave to help him relax. He offers to share with everyone. Uzo assumes this is why Baga liked the garden so much and Rukus says Andraste’s the one who needs it. She says she’s “beset on all sides by idiots.”
The bar staff tells Remy that the third floor is for smoking and Rukus tries to go to his turret room, forgetting that’s in a different tavern. He talks about getting a cannon, still not understanding what turret means. Andraste says they need to rest before they go out hunting the elf-killer again tonight, and Rukus, having a surprisingly good idea, says he should be disguised as an elf since he can take more punishment as bait.
Andraste and Uzo head back to the Irregular Tavern while Remy and Rukus talk to Davil. He says he will help disguise Rukus who might be able to pass for a high elf if he can figure out how to walk. The three of them share some “righteous herb” and Davil hints that the Stone of Golorr might not actually be a stone since rumor says it knows how to find the hidden treasure. Remy sends a message telling Uzo and Andraste to meet back at the Yawning Portal after dinner.
At the Irregular Tavern, the repairs are under way and the roof is fixed. Broxley, after reminding them he needs a key so they don’t have to sneak in through the hole in the roof and get scared by Leif, shows them around. Uzo sees himself in the mirror with his new eyes during the tour. The beds and plants have arrived, but the full plumbing will come later. They rest after the long morning.